


The way you are (not) alike

by Ruta



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Conversations, F/M, Introspection, Season Finale, Slow Burn, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2019-04-22
Packaged: 2020-01-24 04:03:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18563536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ruta/pseuds/Ruta
Summary: "You look like her."Sansa narrows her eyes. It isn't necessary that he says her name. She knows. Her eyes are her mother's eyes. Hers is also the blood-red color of hair. Is it so terrible that she's tired of hearing it?She isn't Mother. She isn't aunt Lysa. Nor she is Margaery Tyrell. Nor Shae. She is none of the women she met and knew.Loved. Hated. Feared.(Set after the "trial". A sansa/jaime moment.)





	The way you are (not) alike

Sansa doesn't know how it ended like that. Even less why she is in the company of Ser Jaime Lannister.

One moment she was with Lord Royce discussing the supplies, the next one she was with Ser Jaime Lannister. (She feels she owes an apology to Lord Royce. It seems that these days it is impossible to carry on a conversation without being interrupted).

She doesn't expect him to thank her for what happened in the morning. He doesn't owe her anything. Both know that the only reason he wasn't burned or has his head still attached to the neck is Brienne of Tarth.  
  
"You look like her."  
  
Sansa narrows her eyes. It isn't necessary that he says her name. She knows. Her eyes are her mother's eyes. Hers is also the blood-red color of hair. Is it so terrible that she's tired of hearing it?  
  
She isn't Mother. She isn't aunt Lysa. Nor she is Margaery Tyrell. Nor Shae. She is none of the women she met and knew. _Loved. Hated. Feared_.  
  
Strong and confident women, paranoid and cold, but authentic, true to themselves. Ruthless in wanting to show the world their true nature, to get the power they deserved. Smart but undervalued. Brilliant and deadly, each in their own way. Ready to fight with every means at their disposal to obtain justice, to be free to live according to their ambitions.  
  
_I am me. Not someone else's shadow_. She doesn't deny the foolish and naive girl who has been once, indeed she remembers her with tender indulgence. She likes what she is, what she does. It took her so long to become the person she is now. Resolute. Self-confident. Brave enough. Skillful with words.  
  
He looks at her out of the corner of his eye. "I was referring to Cersei. You remind me of her."  
  
Oh. _Oh_.  
  
"How?"  
  
"You are similar," he replies without become entangled into details, "but different in all that matters."  
  
Sansa is silent. She thinks of all the things she could say, those she would like to say, that she shouldn't say. It's a game she has learned to master. Power, will, duty. Truth and half truth.  
  
Wanting something doesn't mean getting it, but it's the starting point.  
  
"I think I understand her better now," she admits. She remembers Cersei's perpetual anger, her frustration when she spoke to her about the role a woman has to play. The duty of a daughter to her own House, of a wife to her husband, even when there is no respect to tie them. A mother's protective love towards her children. "When I was young I wanted to be the queen she wasn't. I wanted to be loved, to be respected."  
  
He nods. He doesn't seem surprised at all. "You have every reason to hate her."  
  
"Hatred is a feeling that tires and blinds. Once I hated your family. I wanted to get justice." It wouldn't have been justice. It would have been vengeance. "Then I understood. Killing you will not give me my parents and my brother back. Killing you wouldn't give Bran the chance to walk again. What is lost in the fire cannot be recovered. I let go my hatred. I will never forget what you and your family did against mine."  
  
"I understand."  
  
In his eyes there is a spark of awareness. He doesn't have to be forgiven. His is a journey of expiation.  
  
(When Jaime later finds her watching Jon Snow - her stern mask has slipped a little to finally reveal the young woman below - he recognizes that wistful look, that longing and finds another reason why Sansa Stark reminds him of his sister.)


End file.
